Magic is the escape fantasy of those who cannot cope with the fact that we are limited creatures, that we will grow old and die, that we can never have everything, that we will always be dependent on food and oxygen and the love of others, and that, because of this, we will often feel pain and loss. Magic is the belief that there is some other way of dealing with all of this other than simply by dealing with it.
Which is why I think the really dangerous magic – and I believe all magic is dangerous – is out there in the post-Christmas sales.
Yeeeeeees…
This is a man who believes in a supernatural being in the sky that made the universe in six days, that a man can die and be buried and come back to life after three days and then physically ascend into the firmament despite all biological evidence to the contrary. A man who believes that the bronze age myths and legends subsequently translated, translated again, edited and re-edited and translated once more are some sort of “truth”.
Over that twonk, I’ll take magic every time…
“Good news, Honey. The Guardian wants 1000 words asap”
“We can do with the cash”
~three hours pass~
“Jesus. Fuck! Damn! I just can’t think of anything to moan about!”
“What about the sales? Then just crap on from there, quote a couple of twats to pad it out. Make it sound pious to be a miserable hairshirt”
“Great idea, I think I’ve got it”
“Good. Can I have the car keys, I need to get up to Bicester pronto”
You can always rely on the Groan’s contributors for a good chuckle.
The next time anyone asks me the meaning of ‘bathos,’ I’ll point them to the excerpt above!
So Giles is denouncing easy, but ultimately useless, fixes to life’s problems without noticing that Christianity does precisely that. Work and pray, live on hay, you’ll get pie in the sky when you die.
Shops need to shift their old stock, which means that you can get stuff for far less than you would normally have to pay, so that you can make your meagre income go further. Sure if you are going to buy a load of stuff that you don’t need, just because it is cheap, that is a bad thing. But, on balance, sales are a good thing, as long as you use your common sense. Mrs. Stonyground buys me lots of shaving stuff at this time of year, Gillette gift packs are practically at give away prices, they then last me all year.
Granny Weatherwax. Headology (or however it is …..spelled) 😀
Once knew a dyslexik witch. Turned all her victims into Grofs.