Even if the new Pope thinks I might be – or might not, after all…
With a new Pope in place, the Catholic Church is keen to portray itself as accepting, modern and relevant. But a recent suggestion by Pope Francis that atheists could also be “redeemed” by God has led the church to return to medieval rhetoric – with an official Vatican spokesman forced to clarify that non-believers are indeed destined for hell.
Well, make your minds up. Am I, or aren’t I? On balance, probably not. Therein lies the wonder of religion. It’s all bunkum made up by someone long ago – although some not so long ago – and every so often someone goes off message. They have a choice, then, make it up as they go along, or slap the heretic firmly on the wrist. In this case, it is the Pope who got the slap.
Well, it made I larf. You’ve got to, haven’t you? The alternative is to take it all seriously and, frankly, that’s an impossibility – as impossible as a man dying and coming back to life three days later. Although water into wine is plausible providing you have the time and patience – and some yeast.
Ultimately, the issue of going to heaven and hell or purgatory, for that matter, is a construct created by the church. They were the ones who edited the original scriptures and created the Bible. It’s their club, so they get to decide the rules of entry. Of course, if we are all wrong and Catholics are destined for Dante’s Inferno, then they are in for a bit of a shock. So, I guess, see you there, then.
Traditional ways of going to hell
Not paying due respect to God is one of the big no nos. The breaches of the Ten Commandments to guarantee hell include not believing in God, following different religions, not keeping Sunday as a ‘holy’ day; and taking God’s name “in vain”.
Most teenagers in Britain would fall foul of the ‘Honour your father and your mother’ commandment. Having an affair, killing someone, stealing, or lying are among other things that can send you to hell, if you forget to confess in time that is.
Sex is also a dangerous area. Using contraception, deciding on an abortion, masturbating, being in a same sex relationship, and getting divorced can all see you condemned to the eternal flames.
Many Catholics also believe in the broad categories of the ‘seven deadly sins’ outlined by Pope Gregory the Great in the sixth century: lust, gluttony, avarice, sloth, anger, envy and pride.
Far be it for me to point out that it’s going to be pretty crowded…
But perhaps we are already in Hell from a previous existence.
Although looking at Blair, Mandelson, Campbell etc, I don’t believe I could have ever been sufficiently evil as to deserve them…
O/T Sorry for the delay; have been gallivanting round for the two days when it stopped chucking it down and howling a gale.
That’s fine. One of the downsides of Blogger is that it is either moderation on, or moderation off, there is no in-between – unless you install a third party comments system such as Disqus. As it is, DD’s puerile and cowardly attempts to make my life difficult have failed dismally. No one cares about my identity and I’ve never gone to any great pains to hide it.
Look on the bright side. All the booze is in Hell and you’ll have no trouble getting a light.
I can’t go to heaven anyway, I wouldn’t know anyone.