7 Comments

  2. The way I cope is to be thankful for the time I had with the absent person – friend of relative. But still regret not having spent more time with them, or not let them know how much I appreciated their existance.
    If you are fortunate you will have family or mutual friends for mutual support. If not, there are people out there needing your friendship.
    Nil desperandum and all that.

  4. I share your pain. Her birthday, our wedding anniversary, the day she died, and her funeral, are all days of quiet contemplation and memories. Christmas time, when we had the house filled with family and friends, are now long gone, and I still feel I have nothing to celebrate, often taking myself away somewhere. I know it sounds trite, but specific trips where people of my own age are, helps me get through the “festive season”. One year, I was told that I was a very lucky man, having 40 odd years with someone I loved, and what memories I must have of places we went to and things we experienced. You never really get used to the loss. You just learn to live with it. Take care.

  5. May I offer my condolences, but you are right, time does not heal. It eases a little perhaps, but in quiet moments the mind slips back, especially at anniversaries.

  6. I don’t think we should or would ever forget our loved ones, but I do think that the way we view the loss changes over time, from my experience, the acceptance stage of grief does eventually kick in, which doesn’t mean we don’t still feel pain when we think about our loved one.

    Your post reminded me to reach out to the wife of a dear friend who died at 49 from stomach cancer a couple of years ago.

  7. Keep the memories alive by revisiting them but smile when you do this, don’t be sad.
    The spirits of loved ones are always around and they wouldn’t want us to be sad.

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