In the comments to my post yesterday regarding the forum troll, Doctorvee points to another variation of the species; the blogroach. For those who have not followed the links, I reproduce the comments for your amusement and delectation below. As the Devils Kitchen once pointed out, being on the receiving end of abuse is evidence that one has arrived. Where from, I’m not exactly certain, but I’m almost proud of being the subject of such attention. Perhaps I should prepare an acceptance speech. “I would like to thank my mother and my agent…”
When someone behaves with such arrant stupidity, it is almost remiss not to tear them to pieces and hand them their arse on a platter; criminal negligence, even (even if it does mean temporarily breaking my own rules on trolls). So, here goes; sit back and enjoy the ride.
The conversation was one that occurred some seven months ago, so restarting it after all this time smacked of poor observation skills on the part of our Mr Blogroach Nightrider.
Also Longrider, why do you think you’re some sort of enigmatic Byron/Heathcliff character? To your choice of attire (ie. the jacobean shirts) I could say ‘each to there own’, but what on earth were you thinking when you decided to utilise that ‘Zorro’ style picture? Were you going for the mystical yet romantic hero look? I find it laughable, quite frankly. You call Bob a pretentious egoist, take a look in the mirror matey.
I don’t see myself as anything in particular, but the images concerned were a bit of fun, nothing more. Their target audience (those with goth tendencies) tend to like them. What you find laughable is irrelevant because, your opinion, like you, is irrelevant.
However, having an eccentric taste in dress doesn’t make one pretentious or egotistical any more than the individual who likes to dress in, say, a football strip, for example. Incidentally, as an aside; it is “their” own; not “there” own – if you are going to insult me, the very least you can do is use correct English, it’s only polite.
Having delivered this broadside, our blogroach goes on:
Apologies if you found that at all offensive Longrider, I was merley highlighting your hypocrisy.
Oh, well, that’s alright then… Silly sod. Wearing eccentric clothing and pointing out that Bob Piper’s insulting behaviour when visiting people’s blogs was unacceptable in an earlier comment, is not hypocritical. As an aside; continuing with the “use of English” theme (’cos I just can’t resist and I’m enjoying myself too much); it is “merely” not “merley” ; there is no such word. I’ll be generous and assume it’s a typo, shall I?
It goes on (yeah, ’fraid so):
Bob [Piper], I think you are BRILLIANT.
Oh, dear, we are easily pleased aren’t we? Maybe Bob will send you a signed photograph and you can wet yourself looking at it.
Sigh, Mr Nightrider carries on with his ad hominems:
Longrider stop being so hypocritical and go and play with your bikes. Ps. you are indeed correct, your website is indefinately a ‘useful resource’, I particularly enjoyed meeting your pet tortoises ‘Oscar’ and ‘Jesse’.
This, presumably, because during the discussion I’d pointed out that people find my web page a useful resource. They do. The articles on touring in Europe, for example; so, too, those articles on safely hibernating tortoises. I know this because people email me to say thanks. As for what I should (or should not) do with my time, Mr Nightrider presumes that he has some authority from which to issue me with instructions. Oh, dear, oh, dear. I don’t take instructions from anyone, and certainly not from semi-anonymous, semi-literate buffoons on the Internet. Mr Nightrider, you have no authority (nor, for that matter, relevance); consequently, I recommend that you take your instruction and insert it in the most suitable orifice available. Preferably the one from which your trolling remarks emanate. As an aside; “indefinately” is not a real word. Your grasp of English really is abysmal, isn’t it? Do you mean indefinitely, I wonder? In which case, my site is not fixed, or unlimited? You really are not making any sense. Still, you are at least consistent.
Then comes the backtracking alluded to by Doctorvee:
Besides, if you look on the other blog page you will see (and I quote) ‘apologies if you find this at all offensive, Longrider, I was merely highlighting your hypocrisy.’ What I said was quite clearly tongue-in-cheek, it is unfortunate that certain people fail to recognise that.
No, there was nothing tongue-in-cheek about the comments. They were intended to be as offensive as possible. The backtracking is simply a response to the blog owner’s castigation. Fortunately, I am not easily offended and the cretins who resort to blogroaching certainly cannot cause me offence – I simply treat them and their remarks with the contempt they so richly deserve. And, if I feel so inclined as I have here, I publicly ridicule them for general amusement – a kind of modern version of throwing rotten tomatoes at the poor fool in the stocks. I ought to hate myself for it, but strangely, I don’t. 😀
All of which brings us back to the louse, rather, doesn’t it?