Jamie’s Petard

The school meals service in England is facing collapse because children are shunning healthy menus, caterers will warn today.

Ever since Jamie Oliver’s award-winning programme exposed the poor quality of school dinners, some have seen a 30 per cent reduction in their takings from meals and vending.

Well, there’s a surprise… Perhaps Jamie fucking Oliver will stick to presenting his dreadful facile cookery programmes and stop using his celebrity status to manipulate government policy in future. One can hope…