A Letter From Labour

Having been a member of the labour party for my sins, I occasionally receive correspondence from them exhorting me to rejoin. Today I received another. Actually, it starts off almost okay:

We know that people are angry about MPs’ expenses and we apologise – on behalf of all parties – that the political system has let you and the public down.

This much is true.

Whatever party they belong to, MPs should never have spent taxpayers’ money on clearing their moats or swimming pools, or paying phantom mortgages – and it’s even worse at a time when ordinary families are worried about the impact of the recession.

This, too, is true.

Labour are determined to put things right. This is not a time for papering over cracks – it is time for root and branch reform. And it’s not just a question of paying back money – that is only the first step. That is why Labour have suspended MPs who are suspected of wrongdoing.

Fine words, but where is the substance? All we have seen so far is Brown’s independent regulator idea. And if MPs cannot regulate themselves, how, exactly, are we to trust them to pass legislation that regulates the rest of us?

Now more than ever, families in this community need our help through this recession. Labour will stand by you and your family – not walk on by as the Conservatives did in the 1990s. The Tory government let people sink or swim – their image may have changed, but their principles remain unchanged.

There is a choice for Britain. A choice between Labour which is giving real support to all during this recession – not Tory tax cuts for the wealthy. Between bringing forward job creating investment when it is needed most – not cutting services in the middle of a recession. Between standing up for those who are worried that they could lose their homes or jobs – not walking on by as the Tories did in the 80s and 90s.

Unchanged, eh? It strikes me that they have changed rather much for the worse; they now occupy the same ground as Labour rather than where they should be. I listened to that utter incompetent the prime minister wittering on about “growing our way” out of recession. Look, you lack-wits, you do not borrow your way out of debt. What you do is cut your cloth and reduce your outgoings. Unpalatable to some, maybe, but that is the harsh reality. If the Conservatives plan this approach, then they are right to do so. This doesn’t necessarily mean cutting services – cut out the quangos and the fake charities, drop the ID cards nonsense and the massive surveillance database – that will save money without affecting core services one jot.

At its heart, the Labour Party is about putting people first. The NHS; the National Minimum Wage; Sure Start Children’s Centres; mortgage support for struggling families who suffer a drop in income – all testimonies to Labour’s commitment to ensuring the best chances for everyone.

Yes, well, if that was true, they wouldn’t piss our money up the wall on their pet projects and they wouldn’t treat us like infants who need managing, they would cut out unnecessary government departments; communities and culture for a start. As for the NHS, give me a break… It can be done better and here in France, it is.

We need you to help us, which is why I’m writing to ask you to come back to Labour and re¬join the party at this crucial time.

You’re having a laugh, aren’t you? I wouldn’t sully my ballot paper by voting for you let alone re-join. There is nothing in the Labour party that I can find worth supporting – particularly an incompetent, arrogant and delusional leader who is surrounded by a cabinet of lacklustre managerialists with combined egos that outstrip capability and talent by a parsec. Only in politics could such a bunch of talentless losers be promoted inappropriately so such high office and no one can do a damned thing about it.

Rebecca, recently joined and sent us this message to tell us why she thought the time was right for her to join at this time:

Because she is blind, deluded or has been stuck in a time warp this past twelve years?

I now feel that there is a real danger of the Tories smarming their way to an election victory and as someone who grew up under Thatcher and saw the damage that she did to the spirit of this country I now (long overdue… sorry) feel that I need to act. I don’t want my son growing up under another Tory government with no hope, as I did.

I lived through those years, too. And looking back with the past twelve years to compare them with, I know which I now prefer.

I know in some quarters there is a feeling that politics doesn’t matter. But, as people like Rebecca show, there is also a belief that when people of purpose, passionate belief and shared values unite, we ourselves can make the change we want.

Mmmm, me too, I just suspect it’s not the same change you are talking about, though.

A Tory future is not a future Rebecca wants for her son. By being an active Labour member she sees a way to avoid that.

Delusional, then.

Join with us and Rebecca, and the many members like her who have recently joined and come back to Labour.

I hope you will consider being a member of Labour once again: now is the time to re-join and help us continue to build a better Britain and keep it Labour.

Oh, please, stop, you’re killing me. Never, never, never.

There is a leaflet attached to the letter (on the back is an application form) with a few quotes  from the deranged and the delusional on the flipside. I thought I’d share. This, then, from Elise in London:

The more I hear the Conservatives, the more I want to help at the next general election.

Yeah, me too.

And from Rebecca again:

With the BNP on the rise I think it’s important to play an active role to defeat them.

Ah, yes, the old “if in doubt, the bogeyman will get you” argument.

And finally from Sharon in Dumbarton:

I feel Gordon Brown is the best man to lead us through the difficult economic times, I also feel he is a man of great principles and care.

Bwhahahahahahahahahahaha!