In Which I Channel My Inner Meldrew

I don’t believe it.

Scotland’s largest parents’ organisation is calling for the SNP government to withdraw its schools’ health and wellbeing census, which has attracted opprobrium for asking 14-year-olds about their experience of anal sex.

The controversial poll has united rightwing pro-family campaigners and progressive children’s rights advocates, with both groups fearing it may end up causing harm to the young people it intends to help.

The census, which is administered by local authorities and due to be completed this school year, has been declared “not fit for purpose” by Eileen Prior, the chief executive of Connect.

Apparently children can opt out, or not answer questions they don’t like, but that’s irrelevant – that these creeps are even asking children these questions is beyond the pale.

The survey has previously attracted disapproval for asking secondary pupils in senior 4 and above about relationships and sexual health, with one much-reported question asking pupils to list how much sexual experience they have had, ranging from kissing to vaginal and anal sex.

Regardless of the age of the interviewee, the appropriate answer remans the same: ‘Fuck off and mind your own business.’

Each time I think that these scumbags can’t sink any lower, they manage to prove me wrong…

7 Comments

  1. The SNP administration postponed its portion of the UK national census last year because Covid (only the second time it’s ever failed to be held in a year ending in a “1” in almost 200 years; the last being due to the unpleasantness of 1941) but is steadfastedly determined to inquire into the sex lives of schoolkids. They’re perfectly normal people who can be totally trusted to run a state of their own.

  2. Oh, it only one naughty pupil would answer along the lines of:-
    “I was really scared the first time but Mr Feltcher, the headmaster was so considerate. Just like my friends had told me.”

  3. At school at a similar age, a form was circulated for anyone to apply for Swedish pen-friends. There was a box titled “Sex”, my response of “Yes, Please” cost me an hour in detention.
    (It was an all-boys school, so no-one would need to ask about anal sex…….)

  4. The Scots and the Welsh both voted for their own slice of additional and unnecessary government. Don’t they deserve to get what they voted for good and hard? This time you don’t get asked again in five year’s time in case you’ve changed your mind.

    • Pfft. Barely, we did. I realise I’m effectively parroting a remoaner line here (although I’ve always said I’m unhappy with 50%+1 referendums, even if my side happens to win), but 45% of the electorate (70% of a 60% turnout) voted to establish the “parliament”, and election turnout averages 55%.

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