The Latest Eco-Wankery From the New Religion

Nary a day passes than some eco-loon decides to tell us what it is about our lives that is “unacceptable”. In their eyes, of course.

Large wardrobes of seldom-used clothes are no longer environmentally acceptable and people should instead rent outfits and accessories, according to the Government’s waste watchdog.

The Waste & Resources Action Programme (Wrap) claims that overcoming our obsession with owning goods could be a “secret weapon” in meeting climate change targets. It has called for a fifth of all household spending, £148 billion out of an annual total of £732 billion, to be converted to renting by 2020.

Oh, for crying out loud…

I have a reasonable wardrobe – I wear different clothes for different occasions – a large selection of shirts for work and a couple of suits (in black – always in black), fleeces for the winter, lightweight stuff for the summer, numerous tee shirts and polo shirts. Mrs L has somewhat more… it is not unacceptable. We have decided that it is acceptable and as it is our money, our clothes and our lives, our opinion is the only valid one, and in our opinion, it is perfectly acceptable. Don’t like it? Tough shit.

We have paid for these clothes and we make no apology for doing so. I’ll be damned if I will rent out clothes – I don’t know where they’ve been, after all. It is also worth bearing in mind that buying something outright is less costly than renting over a long period of time. As a child I wondered at those folk who paid multiple times over to rent a television that they could have bought outright for a fraction of the cost. Renting consumables is an absurd idea except for those rare occasions when buying doesn’t make sense – a morning suit for a wedding, for example. Otherwise the idea is utter tosh.

Wrap identifies five categories of goods suitable for renting: high-end clothing; glassware and tableware; tools and equipment for house and garden; vehicles; and telephone, audio and recreational equipment. On clothing, the report proposes that hiring should replace 10 per cent of the retail market within ten years.

Wrap can fuck right off, frankly. I recall the time when we had to rent telephones. I will never return to that situation. When I buy something, it is mine to use and abuse as I see fit. I am beholden to no one. I will never, ever rent a telephone again, nor will I rent – apart from when on holiday – my vehicles. My tools are mine and I care for them. I cannot say the same for a tool that has been used multiple times by other, unknown people. When I want a specific tool to do a job, I buy one. I intend to continue doing just that.

Liz Goodwin, Wrap’s chief executive, said: “It could be quite liberating and free our homes and garages from all that clutter that we rarely use. By hiring, we can also get better party dresses and handbags or a better drill to do some DIY than we would be willing to buy.

If that’s how Liz Goodwin wants to live, jolly good for her. Personally, when I want a tool to do a job, I want to lay my hands on it there and then – not have to go down to the hire shop. So, when I have a job to do that requires a tool that I don’t have, I will go out and buy one, knowing full well that it will come in useful in the future. I will carry on doing so and Liz Goodwin can take a hike. As for suggesting that my house is full of clutter; fucking cheek!

“Why would anyone want to own that many things anyway? We need to have the confidence that we can get things when we need them but we don’t need to have them sitting beside us every day.”

That, frankly, is none of your goddamned business. I do want them sitting by me every day so that when I need them, they are there ready for use.

Ms Goodwin, who said she owned only one evening dress in her “pitifully small wardrobe”, said people needed to understand the environmental cost of ownership. “I hope that, in the future, we will look back and be glad that we have moved on from the day when we felt we needed umpteen pairs of shoes,” she said.

Oh, do piss off. I have several pairs of boots. I want several pairs of boots. I will continue to have as many pairs of boots as I see fit. I wear them on different occasions, Brown ones work well with blue jeans, black ones work well with black jeans and slouch boots set off a black suit nicely. In other words, I want to choose what I wear depending on what I am doing, where I am going or just as the fancy takes me on any given day and I want to be able to mix, match and coordinate colours – that is the point of having a varied wardrobe. That is my choice. Liz Goodwin can butt out and take her pious enviro-wankery with her.

What is it about these people that they want to tell the rest of us how to live? I don’t recall electing Liz Goodwin. I don’t recall giving her the authority to tell me what to do. And as for what is acceptable or not, I will make that decision, not Liz Goodwin and her quango.

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Update: Having mulled it over for a while, I have decided to add this coat to my already extensive wardrobe. It will go nicely with either a black business suit or jeans, loose shirt and western boots. Liz Goodwin may not approve, but, then, Liz Goodwin is hardly a person I should consult on matters of couture.

14 Comments

  1. Mrs L has been know to donate to and buy clothes from charity shops.

    The idea of renting, though is absolutely absurd. They clearly haven’t thought it through.

  2. It’s not going to happen, my good lady for one will not decide far enough in advance which items of clothing she needs for a night out, it rather depends on her mood.

    The entire article and it’s author are total wonks.

  3. Liz Goodwin should try pulling that one on Imelda Marcos, who would doubtless tell her in no uncertain terms where she gets off.

  4. It would be far worse than you are imagining, bear in mind that greenies will be in charge of choosing what clothes are appropriate down at your local, sustainable “First in, Best Dressed”.

  5. Setting aside the obvious underlying theme of this post – ‘what I buy is my business’, it would be interesting to see what the unintended consequences of the implementation of such a proposal might be.
    Without the demand for ‘new’ items, economies of scale for the manufacturer/distributor would disappear. Prices would rise, the cost of rental would increase in time due to wear and tear/replacement at increased prices. The more people rented the higher the wear and tear.
    There would reach a point where rental would become very cost prohibitive.
    I wonder if these people have considered the consequences in the slightest, other than the nonsensical notion of ‘saving the world’……. [again]…

    FFS.

    Andy.

  6. Shouldn’t we ask how many of Liz’s office computers at Wrap are rented? Or for that matter, hole-punches, staplers, thumb-tacks, etc.

    Andy- great point. It wouldn’t occur to Liz and her cronies to actually think about the long-term consequences of their actions (ironically enough, considering how much ‘looking to our future’ climate change bullshit Liz’s crowd talk about)

  7. Andy, I hinted at the economic side of this with televisions. Someone renting out relatively low cost consumer items will be looking to recoup their outlay including maintenance and damage costs within a relatively short period. Certainly not much more than a year. A television is something I would keep for three to five years, until it wears out. I would expect a decent power tool to last at least a decade. Why should I pay three or four times over for something that I can buy outright and may not need maintenance or repair? Buying is the only economic option.

    That said, you are correct that the main thrust of this piece is “leave me the fuck alone”.

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